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This is something that we all know instinctively, whether or not we admit it to ourselves in the face of a failed relationship.Trying to be "friends" is a recently-dumped female's way of saying "I am not ready to let go." However, in some occasions, the male ending the relationship will suggest it. “We’re perpetually fed a line that we’re looking for love in a market that doesn’t value us,” says Marina Adshade, an economics professor in Canada and author of . However, with the gray divorce boom, there are a lot more older people available than ever before. That said, the dating market for older singles isn’t all that easy. There just aren’t that many available singles our age and the ones who are available are an interesting lot (read Anne Lamott’s funny take of her year on to understand).Because men have shorter lifespans, many older men are interested in having a potential caregiver or a “nurse with a purse.” They tend to marry quicker than older women, but it isn’t because older women can’t find a hubby; it’s because women are more likely to be looking for a short-term relationship or a companion, not a husband.That isn’t true for my three girlfriends, but it’s true for me.Whatever the case, "just being friends" is simply not a viable way of relating to a man or woman you've been emotionally or sexually intimate with.The severed emotional ties between you will prevent you from relating to each other in platonic ways for a long time to come - perhaps forever.

And I know this isn't only something I've experienced. It is a final grasp at the remnants of the commitment that they worked so hard for.If, after being dumped, you find yourself tempted to convince your ex to be "just friends" or to "stay in touch" (because he still "means a lot to you"), acknowledge the fact that you really just want to hold on to some fraction of what once was, even if it is nothing like a real relationship and will actually hurt you in the long run. ------------------------------------- If you liked this post, you'll definitely like my book, Beyond the Breakup, which explains everything you need to know about dealing with you ex: what he's thinking, what is motivating him to stay friends with you, how to maximize your chances of getting him back, and how to focus on your future if that doesn't happen.Jennifer Lawrence has split from her boyfriend of one year, director Darren Aronofsky, a source confirms to Just The persistent belief is that women are looking for long-term committed relationship and men are looking for short-term sexual relationships.That may be true for younger people, but that isn’t always the case at this age, she says.

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